Sister hadn't really been herself for the last few
weeks...ever since the dreaded announcement came that MOTHER KENNETH was coming.
Now other than the Second Coming,or the arrival of the anti-Christ, nothing was
more anticipated than a visit from MOTHER KENNETH. The entire school was
scrubbed, polished, and decorated. The hallways were filled with kids on their
knees with pencil erasers trying to remove scuff marks. Sister Alberta decided
to resurrect her favorite "welcome" bulletin board letters and chose Carol
Jenkins to carefully install the greeting above the chalkboard. Now Carol was an
odd young lady...having "developed" in about the third grade. She was very tall
and thin, with somewhat of an aloof air about her, punctuated by a Madonna like
upper torso that she accentuated with colorful angora sweaters.
The nuns would glance at her rocket-like protrusions, but
never said anything.
Carol got right to work, but was soon stopped in her tracks
and severely reprimanded for not placing the pins in the old pinholes. Carol's
job was terminated mid welcome and the faithful doorman replaced her. Carol was
then branded as a "destructive thing" whose fall from grace was all too public.
I don't ever remember her speaking again.
We all had a personal duster to use, except Ray (who was
presumably not going to graduate because of his refusal to bring one), and all
academic concerns were tossed to the wind while we spent our days cleaning..for
the visit. All of this was interrupted however by another "lockdown". One sunny
afternoon Sister glanced out the window and once again froze. Staring straight
ahead she called for immediate quiet, motioning to Donald Witfeld to come to her
side. While we all sat motionless she quietly announced that there was a man
with a knife trying to hide behind a tree near the playground. Even though none
of us could discern anything, Sister quietly hatched a plan. Donald of course
was chosen to save the day, and was once again dispatched to fetch Father. She
instructed him to take cover in the forsythia bushes, and move slowly (
reminiscent of the savages that she'd been reading to us about ). Ray
volunteered that this unseen person was probably an escaped killer, and Sister
nodded agreement. We were instructed not to breathe, and poor Donald crept
silently out the door. Watching him slither through the shrubbery was
hilarious...like a silent movie...and even the likes of Paul the breakfast eater
and Hippsy Gibbon, and Carol with the rockets started to laugh. All hell broke
loose. The gales of laughter from our classroom reached such a level that it
even brought the principal in. Donald was leaping like a gazelle from bush to
bush...and the bewildered Sister Laura said " What's he doing?" Sister Alberta
told her about the killer behind the tree...Sister Laura looked out the window
and said " I don't see anyone"...gave Sister Alberta a really strange look...and
left. Donald suddenly reappeared, leaves in his hair and unusually disheveled,
reporting that Father said he didn't see anyone. ( Father rarely got
"involved").
Sister turned the lights back on...glared at Donald for about
an hour, and then stood up and began reading to us. " TWO HUNDRED
WAGONS",,,,,and once again I got home around three o'clock and my Mom said "How
was school?"...
and I would say once again " You wouldn't believe
it".
No comments:
Post a Comment